The Rosebush

It’s hot here in Samui. 

It’s been a bit of a strange week really… end of term last week so all the usual chaos that goes with that.  Lots of people have been preparing for trips away so there’s been a lot of talk about flying and annoying travel agents.  (Well, one in particular.)

Anyway, then my friend from R*meike came to visit, Susanne, so spent some time with her, which was awesome… weird to see her here, but really cool. 

Then Josh got sick on Sunday, the day before we were due to fly to Samui via Bangkok.  Anyway, fortunately he made a bit of a recovery and here we are, after some flight delays.  So today we are going to sit on the beach and also arrange our diving for tomorrow.

Fingies crossed we dont get eaten by sharks

I’m coming home for Easter!

On Monday, I’m off to Ko Samui to go diving with Josh for a few days, then on Sat 31st I’m flying home from Bangkok for two fantastic weeks!! They WERE going to be relaxing, but now it seems they are going to be insanely busy catching up with friends, family etc.

I’m hiring a car (a Ford Ka… bleugh!) so will be somewhat mobile, though I am skint so trying to avoid splurging on petrol…

God, I can’t WAIT… I’m going to drink nice strong tea, eat yummy food, cuddle cats, watch decent tv, sleep in my own bed… what sheer bliss!!  I’m going to be able to buy things like chopped tomatoes and mature cheddar cheese, twiglets and Ricicles and best of all… BEST OF ALL… I’m gonna be able to use my *mobile phone*!!!!! 

Would like to draw your attention to the link on the right entitled ‘Champagne Chicken’.  This is a blog which is going to document the travels of my line manager and two weirdo colleagues in Indonesia over the next 3 weeks or so.  Should be amusing…

In other news…

I seem to have taken on global giant Starbucks and beaten them!  Okay, the money isn’t in my bank account yet, but I am 99.9% of the way there to suing the scuzzbuckets for the hell I went through when I worked at the Taplow store nearly 4 years ago, and the injury in my wrist which may never go away as a result… They’ve made me an offer and I’ve taken it on the advice of my solicitor.  It’s not much, but I feel a small victory has been won on the part of Joe Bloggs.  It’s taken 3 years, but hey ho ;)  Oh and don’t get me wrong, I will still be indulging in their ridiculously expensive beverages :)  Can’t resist those hazelnut lattes….

With all the doctors and psychologists in the world, you would think that somebody could come up with a website about clinical depression which doesn’t make clinically depressed people think “What a load of crap.”

First, I was unfortunate enough to stumble across www.depression.com which just screams ‘yankee’ all over it.  The link which gives you advice on ‘visualising your stress’ and repeating a word to yourself such as ‘calm’ was a total and utter waste of 90 seconds of my day.

The next attempt was www.clinical-depression.co.uk.  A good first impression - a home page with a big happy yellow sun on it (patronising?), and the ‘learning path’ seemed promising right up until I started reading about ‘reframing’ and how no event in life is ‘bad’, it’s only human perception which makes it bad.  In other words, never mind that 300,000 people died in the Tsunami… just think of all that extra SPACE! Maybe you can visualise it as your ‘happy place’ and repeat the word ’shit’ to yourself to relieve your stress.

I translated this little nugget as basically saying “The reason you think this event in your life is bad is because you’re looking at it from the wrong angle.”  In other words, it’s your own fault - change your perspective.

And because I *am* clinically depressed, I couldn’t be bothered to look any futher.  Well done, quacks.

Oh and if that’s not all - lots of stuff online about how to deal with depression when you’ve just been diagnosed, but not so much about how to deal with it long-term.  I was diagnosed with depression when I was 12.  I’m now 26 - nothing’s changed and I still ask myself the same questions and feel the same feelings - what do you do if your day to day life is fine and your illness doesn’t affect anything, but then something happens and you begin to feel yourself losing control?  How do you convince the people around you that you’re not losing your mind and that it’s only temporary?  And how the hell do you deal with that feeling… starting to cry at inappropriate moments or at the slightest hint of sympathy from somebody else - how can that embarrassment be avoided? More drugs? Gentle exercise?  Give me a break…

I love stupid people… they provide me with hearty entertainment.

Take, for example, Mr Brett Rees.  “TV phone-ins cost me £9000.  They should have cut me off.”

My support of Darwinism is dwindling - how is this guy even alive?

A journalist for the BBC, Kate McGeown, has been running various series of articles about Burma and she is currently focusing on the Thai-Burma border.

You might not be very interested in this subject, but as Burma is where I now live and there are some really serious issues here, I really want to encourage people to read the articles so that you can try to begin to understand the terrible things (and the wonderful things, sometimes) which are going on here.

I guess as an expat here, I feel it’s my responsibility to try to tell people about what’s going on.  Kate McGeown’s articles are, of course, rather anti-government… but the truth is that it’s difficult to feel any other way when you see this country and the damage that the Tatmadaw can and are doing.

Please read this.  I will post links to more of her articles as they come.

Life on the Thai-Burma border

Thai-Burma border - medical work

Fighting spirit

Article archive:

Orwellian State

Daily struggle to cope

Burma’s health and schooling

Capital confusion

Continuing the fight

Should tourists go?

Country profile

with a song!  One of my favourite songs of all time.  It has memories for me and brings back a time of real heartache and desperation… but I’m glad I can listen to it and feel happy now

click here!!!